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Thursday, May 20, 2010

HCG D 47-50

This past week has been super stressful and this new week well shall see.  Awaiting test results for hubby and more tests to come.  We had to delay getting Lady due to the new turn of events in our lives.  That is on next weeks plans.

So after a week of really crappy eating and just not caring mostly too stressed out to focus.  Amazing how much energy goes into losing weight lol.  Well got back on Sunda felt hungry but I think it was I wanted to eat the crap due to still awaiting those test results to find out what is up with my husband.  Monday I was down 3lbs from Sundays weigh in putting me back to the 23.2lbs lost (which is down from a couple weeks ago) I was at 26.8lbs gone:(  That is ok I am ready to be strong again and what ever life throws our way I will be getting healthier no matter what!!  TOM FINALLY arrived and I am chalking the lateness to that of the stress we are under delaying its arrival.  I am going to the end of May...I need to get into the 250s since we will be doing horseback riding this summer and many places have a weight limit of 250.

Tuesday was down 1.4, Weds down 1.2 and today Thursday I am down another 1.8.  I have stuck strictly to protocol...no caution foods what so ever.  during my week of totally crappy I don't care what I eat week I gained 6.4 lbs I am now below my last lowest weigh in before dealing with TOM.  Sure I could look at it this way I could be that 7lbs lower still of what I was...but I can't sit here and beat myself up...life happened I just need to learn more how to deal with those situations.  I think what gets me or scares me most is out of habit every morning I still weighed in...so why not out of habit after weeks of eating healthy could I not stick to that...those numbers going up on made me not care more during the highest stress moments.  I couldn't eat a lot of the not so great food choices but had many of those bad choices...I suppose the weight gain could have been a lot worse as I must have conscientiously cared a little as when I ordered pizza it was with Ranch rather than sodium loaded red sauce...Remember my indiscretion a few weeks back where one slice made me gain 3 lbs over night...well I gained nothing over my ranch with bacon pizza.

Now that the weight is going down I feel better and will be able to stabilize much better than before and will feel more at ease about going to P3.  This is why I chose to get back on after my interruption rather than moving on.  I was really unstable and fluctuating in my weight and didn't feel it was good to move to next phase with things like that.  I feel P3 would have been a disaster.

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